


our love (wasn't) is enough

by Stars_dreaming (orphan_account)



Series: 88 MCU drabbles and oneshots [65]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Renegotiated Sokovia Accords, F/M, Gen, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Sokovia Accords
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-03
Updated: 2019-05-03
Packaged: 2020-02-16 13:06:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,402
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18692071
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/Stars_dreaming
Summary: When she talks to Steve, he’s sitting by the lake.He hasn’t shaved yet, but she thinks the beard suits him. It makes him look more mature and less Captain America.Maybe that’s the point. Maybe he’s not Cap anymore, and now he’s just Steve Rogers.





	our love (wasn't) is enough

“You _know_ it's not like that.”

“Then why are you doing this?”

“Because you lied. And not only to Tony – you lied to all of us. You knew. You _knew_ all along that the Winter Soldier killed his parents and you didn’t say a word.”

“Sugar, please. Please don’t do this to me.”

“You don’t get your women back by begging for it. Words don’t mean anything to me.”

She leaves him in the glass room and refuses to acknowledge the tears streaming down her cheeks. He doesn’t chase her.

Their love wasn’t enough.

 

* * *

 

 

She saves Rhodey from falling to his death just in time, but she can’t forget the image of his body plummeting down to the ground and the pure fear that was coursing through her body.

She doesn’t want to think about what would have happened if she hadn’t caught him, but she does. Or at least her nightmares do.

She wakes up one too many times screaming and drenched in sweat and thinks, this is it, and she gets out of bed.

 

Rhodey is awake when she steps into his bedroom in the Compound.

She curls her arms around herself as he looks up from his book.

“What is it?” He asks. His voice is soft and warm. It makes her feel calm. “I can’t sleep,” she admits. “I just… I keep thinking about your fall. And about what could have happened. I can’t shake the fear off me, Rhodey.” She chokes up and he rubs her back as she sits down on his bed.

“And my room reminds me of everything…” _Of everything we lost,_ she doesn’t say. _Of Steve_.

Rhodey smiles at her, warm in only a way he can. “You can sleep here if you’d like,” he whispers.

He helps her under the covers and presses a kiss to her forehead – another one of those comforting gestures – before he turns to leave, but she grabs his wrist in time.

“Stay.” She says, her voice sounding on the edge of breaking. “Please.”

Rhodey looks at her and then he nods. He crawls under the covers next to her, rests half against the bed frame and lets her pull her head on his chest. His arm is curled around her.

“I’ll always stay if you need me,” he whispers as he presses his lips to her temple. She sighs softly and she knows it’s going to be okay, no matter what the universe throws at them.

 

* * *

 

 

She sees Steve again in Wakanda, after one year.

It only takes her one look at him to know that she will never, _ever_ fall out of love with him.

And that hurts her more than it should.

 

T’Challa is an enormously kind man who grants them chambers in the south wing of the palace, far away from the Rogues’ residence.

Y/N is grateful to him in many ways and she’s also very grateful to Tony and Rhodey, who help her avoid the Rogues every time.

They help each other out, really. Rhodey doesn’t have too much trouble with the – _former,_ Y/N remembers – Rogues, but Tony is still very angry and very hurt, and Y/N just doesn’t trust herself enough.

 

Natasha reaches out to her, though.

They’re standing on the gallery looking out over the courtyard and it’s the middle of the night.

“You should talk to him,” Natasha says softly.

Y/N tenses again. _Love is for children, love is for children, love is for children,_ she repeats in her head.

Natasha’s overcome it; Natasha can see behind all their faults and mistakes, but Y/N’s still hauled up in her own trauma.

So she doesn’t respond and walks away, because it’s the only way she knows how to deal with the situation.

She knows Natasha doesn’t blame her – not really.

After all, they grew up together. They know each other better than anyone.

 

Y/N knows Bucky remains in his hut. She only speaks him once, after one of their longer meetings with the United Nations.

He looks at her and asks her how she’s doing – she can see Steve on the other side of the room giving her a wistful look.

She doesn’t even bother to smile at him (even though she knows he’s only the victim here) and says, “Perfectly. What a life full of secrets doesn’t do for your skin,” and she walks away.

She knows it’s a low blow, though, especially to Bucky, but she has too much pride to apologize.

 

Together with the UN and several governments, they set up new, reformed Accords.

Tony’s worked very, very hard for this, even though he says he doesn’t. And for once Y/N wants him to be the selfish one in the situation and take the spotlight because he deserves it.

The Avengers won’t be on calls from the governments and they can decide for themselves where to go – _but_ the government or the UN or any other organization across the globe can call in their help and ask for it nicely.

There’s no giving up secret identities (lucky Peter) and no arresting people who don’t want to sign and certainly no throwing people on the Raft.

And then Tony adds more. Nobody asked for it and they really don’t deserve it, but he makes them new suits and has already so many designs for new weapons – he buys Wilson a new apartment and gifts Bucky a considerate amount of money to buy an apartment for himself. He even has a new arm for the former Winter Soldier.

 

Y/N cries in Rhodey’s room after that, and then some more in Tony’s room while they’re video calling Pep.

 

Later, she asks the two men where they go from now on.

Tony smiles and shrugs, says, “I’m laying low for a while. Build something with Pep, I think.”

“Army upstate,” says Rhodey. Her chest tightens, and she feels a bit lonely. But Rhodey promises her he’ll stay a while.

 

* * *

 

 

The Compound feels different with the others back again.

Y/N has her own room now, next to Rhodey’s, and they spend most their days together until his leave draws near.

 

“You need to talk to them,” Rhodey tells her one afternoon. “Just talk to them. Nothing has to come out of it, and nobody would blame you if you walked out that door after it, but you deserve closure too.”

 

So she does.

She apologizes to Bucky about her comment, but he can laugh about it, luckily.

She talks to the others – apologizes to Natasha and jokes with Sam and Clint.

 

When she talks to Steve, he’s sitting by the lake.

He hasn’t shaved yet, but she thinks the beard suits him. It makes him look more mature and less Captain America.

Maybe that’s the point. Maybe he’s not Cap anymore, and now he’s just Steve Rogers.

“I’m sorry,” he croaks to her, and she smiles lightly.

“Me too,” she says. And that’s that. There’s not much more to talk about – later, when they’re in bed next to each other, they talk about feelings and possibilities and wrong choices and all that – but right now by that lake, those words are all they need.

“I love you,” she whispers to him as she sits down next to him. He puts an arm around her, and they watch the sunset together.

 

* * *

 

 

Tony and Steve retire officially two years later. The mantle of Iron Man is taken over by a separate AI Tony created (and later by Harley Keener) and Steve passes his shield on to Bucky.

Only a few years later Bucky passes the shield on to Sam, and they become Cap and the White Wolf together.

 

Y/N sits by their lake – _their_ lake – in the soft glow of the sun while the wind rustles the leaves in the trees behind her with her small boy cradled in her arms.

Steve is playing with their daughter Eve, who is now two springs old, by the shore. They’re both laughing.

Y/N smiles at the baby gurgling in her arms.

She coos softly. “You have the best family in the world,” she whispers to him, and he laughs as if he knows.

She looks at Steve, who gives her a soft smile that holds all the love in the world for her, and she smiles back, giving him her own love in return.

It’s enough.


End file.
